Quick Exit
With Respect is not a crisis response service. For crisis responses phone:
  • 000 Victoria Police for immediate safety
  • 1800 RESPECT family violence and sexual assault 24-hour telephone support
  • 1800 015 188 Safe Steps Victoria available 24 hours for crisis support for women
To leave this site quickly, click the quick exit button.


Tuesday, 03 March 2020 11:57

The Orange Door

The Orange Door is a free service for all adults, children and young people who are experiencing or have experienced family violence. The Orange Door work with people who use violence as well as people experiencing violence. 

The Orange Door provides:

  • A crisis response, including practical assistance, within business hours 
  • Immediate referrals to specialist services such as legal advice, accommodation, medical treatment and care, and coordination with protective services (such as Victoria Police) to provide flexible responses tailored to individual needs.

You can request The Orange Door refer you to With RespectSecondary consults are available to The Orange Door from With Respect.

Tuesday, 11 February 2020 17:27


WeDeserve is a WithRespect primary prevention project seeking to build the knowledge around trans and gender diverse people and their relationships. WeDeserve used a co-production model to elevate the voices of trans and gender diverse communities throughout the project.

Tuesday, 04 February 2020 10:26

What is Family Violence

What is family violence?

Under the Family Violence Protection Act 2008 (Vic), family violence is:

  • behaviour by a person towards a family member of that person if that behaviour
    • is physically or sexually abusive; or
    • is emotionally or psychologically abusive; or
    • is economically abusive; or
    • is threatening; or
    • is coercive; or
    • in any other way controls or dominates the family member and causes that family member to feel fear for the safety or wellbeing of that family member or another person; or
  • behaviour by a person that causes a child to hear or witness, or otherwise be exposed to the effects of, behaviour referred to in paragraph (a).

It is important to note these behaviours can be used via telecommunications (e.g. internet or phone) as well as in person.

Definition of family

The definition of family in the Protection Act is inclusive, and includes:

  • Biological family
  • Kin relationships
  • Marriage, de facto or intimate personal relationships (including lesbian, gay or queer relationships)
  • Parents and children who are not related biologically (including rainbow families)
  • Children who usually reside with another person (e.g. foster children)
  • Children of partners
  • Current and former relationships
  • People living in the same house
  • People living in the same residential facility and who are reliant on care (‘family like’)
  • The carer of a person with a disability if the person regards the carer as a family member.

For LGBTIQ people, this can also include families of choice: friends and community members who play the role of family particularly where families of origin are unsupportive or estranged.

Intimate personal relationships may be monogamous, open or polyamorous, short or long term, live-in or not, married or not, or long distance, both physical and emotional, primarily physical or primarily emotional.

Thursday, 30 January 2020 02:21

What is Gaslighting

You may have heard of ‘gaslighting’, a term used to describe a form of emotional and psychological manipulation and abuse.

Gaslighting can cause someone to question their own perception of events, their memory, their thoughts, and doubt their sanity.

Wednesday, 29 January 2020 02:13

Coming Out or Staying In

Whether you are lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, gender diverse, queer, non-binary, or are someone with a variation in sex characteristics, we often make daily decisions to come out or to friends, chosen family, colleagues, school staff, service providers, our parents or family members. We often make decisions where we are faced with feeling unsafe, feeling uncomfortable.

In any relationship it is important to feel not only physically safe, but emotionally safe as well. Positive relationships value a person’s unique attributes and allow space for all parties to speak their mind and share decision making.

Often it can be difficult to recognise or articulate your experience as family or intimate partner violence. This may be due to ongoing control, manipulation or gaslighting as well as minimisation from family, friends, or the person using violence.

People may experience intimate partner violence from a current partner, partners or ex-partners. Family Violence can be used by someone from family of origin, chosen family, or someone in a caring role.

Wednesday, 29 January 2020 13:30

Making Decisions

Whether you are a sole prospective parent, partners or co-parents, or other family members like a known donor or surrogate, everyone involved needs to understand what decisions might need to be made, the information that might support the decision making process and think about how to approach decision making in a respectful way.


Wednesday, 29 January 2020 07:17

Elder Abuse

Many older and ageing LGBTIQ+ people enjoy respectful and safe relationships regardless of their age, family circumstances or care needs. Warm, loving and intimate relationships continue throughout our lifetimes, yet sometimes older people are targets of violence due to ageism, homophobia, and gender based violence.

Thursday, 30 January 2020 12:41

Being Bi+ or Multi-Gender Attracted

Within our LGBTIQ+ communities, many of us are multi-gender attracted. Like everyone, bisexual plus and multi-gender attracted people want to feel safe, welcome, and respected within all their relationships, including with partners or families, at work or at school. Being able to express who we are without fear of discrimination or hostility is important, especially within relationships.

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